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Remember j.a.taylor and myself both suffer from depression. I know you probably find what he said hard, but he is right.

When I get depressed I blame everyone for the way I feel - my boss, my husband, a workmate, a shop assistant - anyone I can pin with a reason for the way I feel. Because of the disordered thinking, I feel relief in pinning the blame where I do. Anywhere but on my own disordered thinking.

When we are depressed, we can't trust our thinking.

It is hard to accept that, I know.

Here is a link which may help you talk about your symptoms with someone. You need to talk about this to people who have your best interests at heart.

http://www.beyondblue.org.au/index.aspx?link_id=89.676

love and prayers

Di

Here is a link to a US organisation. (The one I sent, though informative, is Australian)


http://www.dbsalliance.org/site/PageSer ... crisisinfo


hugs

Di

AdmiralCougar wrote:In the following thread I discovered that Snoredog is the boards Resident Troll. With his personal attacks.

viewtopic/t24675/I-have-a-choices-of-4- ... -tips.html

I had decided to withdraw from the forum a little (I never meant it to sound like I would completely leave the board.) because I realized that with my state of mind right now I can't handle attacks like that. In the past I could let something like that slide, but as depressed as I've been I almost did something really stupid because of how his attack affected me. If my husband hadn't have come home when he did I don't think I'd be here right now. I had gathered my meds (most of them an almost full three month supply) and some of the old unfinished prescriptions around the house and I almost took everything. Before I was fairly sure I could never go through with it, but after yesterday I can't say that anymore. I need to get help, and I don't get to see my Dr. till Friday. I can say to myself all I want right now that he means nothing, he is nothing, what he says is crap, but I can't stop feeling how I am.

I can truly say I don't care how helpful his posts may have been in the past. They are no longer wanted or welcomed in my current or future threads. But since Trolls seem to be allowed to roam free I'm going to mostly relegate myself to PM's for awhile. I know it is a silly thing to get so upset over, I feel really stupid for letting a nobody on the internet get to me.

*huggles everyone but the Troll*
Christy

Yeah, I know what you mean.

Here's some light reading that will...will..

Actually, I don't know what it will do, but here's the thread, and a thread within a thread...

Whatever Happened To...?

Will the Forces of Good eventually overcome the Forces of Evil in the world?

Of course they will.

But internet forums are a virtual world with about as much reality as Warcraft, so this will always be the Devil's Playground.

What I found surprising was not the number of idiots (there really aren't that many) but the lack of patriots.

ozij wrote:You can take or leave snoredog - but treating the whole forum as though it had snoredog's rules of engagement does a disservice to both yourself and other forum members.

This is not snoredog's forum.

O.

There's a patriot.
SAG

I think Ozij said it best. Thanks for that, Ozij!!!!

AC - you know how to reach me. Write me offlist. I can't do PM's from work. You ARE depressed, and your health is the main cause. You need friends, and I'm one of them. Don't write the forum off for one bad interaction.

Huggers,
Barbara

Bear in mind that SAG and others have taken their fair share of lumps from various types who might be called Trolls.

There were two MDs who were also OSA patients who were very active on the forum through this last spring. I found their posts and threads to be extremely helpful--they were a great resource for forum members. Unfortunately, they left the forum completely because of personal attacks and attacks on the medical profession as a whole--and I don't recall SD having anything to do with that. Compared to this spring things are pretty tame around here these days.

AdmiralCougar wrote:In the past I could let something like that slide, but as depressed as I've been...

Sorry to hear about the depression, Christy. Depression seems to go hand-in-hand with so many disorders--especially sleep disorders. There are plenty of us here who have gone through the same thing. Truth be told, I'm starting to wonder if there are any of us here who do not go through at least infrequent bouts of depression.

Please pick some good friends here to lean on, Christy. But by all means you musn't allow anyone here the absolute power to adversely impact your emotions. I realize what difficult advice that can be to follow.

You owe it to yourself to get the support and expertise that you require to get healed. Then you owe it to the sleep community to someday pay back at least a teensie portion of that good will. There will be others who come along who will need your help some day. Please don't allow that wonderful chain of people-helping-people to be broken. We don't need any one link in that chain. Rather, we need them all--including and especially yours.

StillAnotherGuest wrote:There's a patriot.

Would you mind clarifying if it's a holy war or a revolutionary war that you're trying to inspire on this message board?

But on a serious note, I am personally adverse to the idea of polarizing forum member(s) into those extreme theological pigeonholes of Good and Evil. We all necessarily pass judgment of the risks and traits inherent in our daily lives. But to dispense such grand judgments of the character or spiritual morality of others here is simply not within our meager means or cosmic place.

That said, I sure do hope you continue to come back here often to share your sleep expertise, SAG. You know I'm a fan of yours.

snoredog wrote:someday science will catch up to what I'm saying...

You give behavioral scientists way too much credit. I still say there's an excellent chance they may never figure you out. But I too hope that "someday" epiphany will arrive. .

Unfortunately most internet forums have trolls around. Sometimes even moderators are trolls. Some forums are heavily moderated so there can't be any dissenting opinions.

Personally, I respect both SnoreDog and SAG. However I respect each for different reasons.

I know SnoreDog is abrasive but he has a vast wealth of information. I purchased the soyala and contacted Somnotech when I had problems based on his posts. I think he is aware of a lot of sleep apnea literature and information as a layman. I have also seen the negative side of SnoreDog in repeated attacks. I just try to read his posts and you can tell pretty early in them if he has helpful information or is out to attack someone. He really does know a lot as a layman. I just wish he would be a little more mellow.

I respect SAG with his professional options and expertise. I know he was attacked for deleting posts where SnoreDog attacked a tech. As much as I don't approve of censorship on an forum, I think the attacks were uncalled for and stated such at the time. Did anyone else notice that those posts never reappeared? or did I miss that? SAG had provided a ton of free advice to online sleep forums under all his masks - deltadave, sleepydave, stillanotherguest are the 3 I am aware of. I hope I am not divulging any secret information by naming these.

There are many others on the forum I also respect and one has to remember each of us who participate here brings our own personalities, problems, and knowledge to this place. We all started out as newbies not knowing what this thing called sleep apnea was and we came here for support and information. The "oldies" helped guide us as we went through this journey. With this we faced problems and sought help. Together as a group we grow and share knowledge. We each learn how to deal with our problems at our own rate.

Not everything works for everyone so we learn options and adjust what is written here to our own circumstances. No one here knows everything but again we are here to share our knowledge and experiences with others.

Each of us has other medical and mental health issues hidden inside of us. Sometimes we openly share them but many times we don't. That doesn't make them any less real. However when we need real medical help, it is very important to seek out competent medical professionals. A lot of the suggestions here work for many people with OSA but not for everyone and I would hope that any newbie would realize that.

AC, as much as you feel attacked by SnoreDog, remember you are above his attacks. You can choose to ignore them. You can choose to walk away. But you can also take the good advice he can offer if you can sort it out from all the negative stuff you are feeling. He isn't any better or worse of a person than you are. We come here as equals.

As has been pointed out above, many of us suffer from depression. I am sure there are many other mental health issues facing people on this forum. Remember this isn't a mental health forum but there are those around if you search for them. But again, also remember if you need urgent medical care, you have to find it locally and not online.

If you need to see your doctor then walk in and demand to be seen or go to the nearest ER. If you think you are going to take an OD of pills, call a crisis line. 1-800-SUICIDE and 1-800-273-TALK seem to be mentioned often online. Check your phone book too for local numbers. If it comes down to it call 911 and ask to be connected to a crisis counselor. Some areas of the country have other mental health crisis numbers - again check your phone book.

There isn't any shame in calling one of these numbers. I have done it myself many times. I know there is still a stigma in mental illness in this country, but which is worse - living with it without getting help or getting the help you need and deserve. What might even be worse is to carry through and OD. Yeah, been there done that myself. I don't talk about it. The first time I had pills in hand I called a crisis line and it really helped me sort out what was going on. Unfortunately the second time years later, well I took the pills and ended up in the hospital for a while. Who knows what permanent damage I did that day? I would highly recommend not doing it and would suggest you call the crisis lines.

If you need to go into the hospital for a while then I would also suggest voluntary commitment over involuntary. Don't worry about the money as you have the rest of your life to make the $$ to pay for it. They will work out payment options.

You made a step forward in accepting this diagnosis of sleep apnea and you are working on treating it. Is depression that much worse? Can't you work on getting help for it?

Okay - end of my soapbox for the day.


......................

and now I expect to be attacked .................

Oh well - it won't be my first time online let alone in a sleep apnea forum.

Jules, nice post.

{{{{{{JULES}}}}}}
Babs

yeah and I knew I was going to be attacked --- didn't realize it was going to start off being so gentle

Jules,

Thanks for the post.

It's good for Christy to see all the people who have responded, and I hope that she understands that many of us care about what she's going through.

It can also be quite overwhelming when you're struggling both physically and emotionally, and dealing with a multiplicity of issues.

And sometimes, its hard to know where to begin. The mind affects the body, and the body affects the mind.

But when you're considering ending it all, it's time to get serious about taking care of yourself.

jules wrote:yeah and I knew I was going to be attacked --- didn't realize it was going to start off being so gentle

Typical Depressive, perceives all attempts at connection as attack...

Yer not verra cuddly, but I like ya' fine anyway, Jules.
Babs

Babette wrote:

jules wrote:yeah and I knew I was going to be attacked --- didn't realize it was going to start off being so gentle

Typical Depressive, perceives all attempts at connection as attack...

Yer not verra cuddly, but I like ya' fine anyway, Jules.
Babs

Was that an invite to find out how cuddly I really am?

Hmmmmm..... Well, now that I'm all warm and well fed, I'll have to sleep on that and get back to you tomorrow.

Hee hee hee,
Babs

And here I was hoping for a nice quiet meeting at a half way point - say in 2 hours.

It's a little cold and damp to be smooching in the parking lot of the Centralia outlet mall, don't you think?

Hey, where you been? You're never on the chat at dinner time anymore...

BTW, the Chili Verde was VERY GOOD.
Babs